Batgirl

If you ask me, Batgirl's off-duty wardrobe could do with a little tweaking...

Tracker

The barefooted tracker half-squatted, half-kneeled, the tips of the weird artistic dangly crocheted what's-its attached to the front of her shirt lightly brushing the ground.  She ran her fingertips through the rough grains of sand, squinted into the distance, and wet her parched lips with her tongue before speaking

"Someone came this way two-- no, two-and-a-half hours ago.  He traveled alone and he traveled swiftly.  But I know a shortcut.  If we start now, we can head him off at the old pass."

Pooch Week: From Nose to Tail

Lest you think knitted pants are only for (ill-advised) humans... 

Pooch Week: Scraptastic

#1:   The use of fun fur-type yarn on a dog that already has fur never fails to intrigue. 

#2:  This dog's full-body sweater seems to have been made of whatever scraps were lying around.  On the one hand, I applaud this frugality.  (Let no yarn go to waste!)  On the other hand, doesn't man's best friend deserve better? 

#3:  What is that green, feathery-looking thing on top of the dog's head? 

#4:  Bravo for accepting (and meeting) the challenge to make the Dachshund (a breed of dog that looks a little silly under the best of circumstances) even more amusing to look at.  

Pooch Week: Ear Supplements

First:  "Why, Mommy?  Why?"

Second:  Ear supplements for dogs, an important issue we first brought to your attention in this post. 

Pooch Week: Puponcho

It's a new fad poised to sweep across the nation-- the Puponcho!  A poncho for pups!  (Get it? Haw-haw.)

Pooch Week: Vicarious

As Maryann tested the fit of the elaborate sweater-dress she'd just knitted for her beloved Muffin, the thought popped into her mind that perhaps Steve hadn't been completely wrong...  Was she living vicariously through her furry friend?  It was true that Muffin's engagement calendar was more full than her own...

Pooch Week: Saddle Up!

Possibly it's just some sort of cutesy belt, but it looks disturbingly like a saddle.  Fluffy, if I were you, I'd keep an eye open for tiny monkeys wearing cowboy hats. 

Pooch Week: Scarf & Hat Set

Sure, it's cute, but won't s/he just be constantly tripping over the ends of scarf?  And isn't this a little of a strangulation hazard?  ...Or a choking hazard, if the dog is anything like mine are.  (They'd be pulling at that thing before I could manage to get it on them.)

Pooch Week: You Ain't Lion!

It's Pooch Week at Yarn Yuck!

Many of us around the world share our homes, our lives-- even our beds-- with our dogs, so it should come as no surprise that those canine companions also get a share of our handmade, yarn-based handicrafts.

Let's take a look at some of those dog-centric yarn-crafts!

Dog in lion costume:  "Why are you doing this to me?"

Dog-owner / lion-costume-maker:  "That'll teach you to piddle on Mommy's handmade Persian carpet."

What the Frou-Frou Nightmare?!

Today's Yarn Yuck is a curious case...

On the one hand, I can't imagine anything more little-lady, lacy frou-frou.  I mean, oh my gosh!  The doily-esque fabric!  The pompoms!  The spiral dangles! The mesh leg-warmers (with more pompoms)! 

On the other... short skirts and see-through tops, anyone?  (Heck, in the version on the left, you can see through skirt, too.)

As usual, I can't help but wonder if anyone actually wears this stuff.  And is so, where are they wearing it?

Diagnosis YarnYuck

This looks like an acute case of fug-induced coma... 

...but then again, I'm not a doctor (don't even play one on TV), nor am I a reputable fashion critic (is there such a thing?).

Fluff & Fringe

Between the fluff and the fringe, one hardly knows where to look...

But two things:
First, this unflattering dress somehow manages to make a beautiful model look a little "thick" in the middle, which doesn't bode well for the rest of us. 

Second, would it have been so hard to edit out the ends of her hair that show right below her armpit?

Parasol

...In thirty years, she would wonder how she had sustained so much skin damage.  ("But I never went anywhere without a parasol to protect me from the sun!")

...In thirty minutes, she would wonder why people were staring as she walked past, parasol all a-twirl.  ("I know I'm lookin' good, but still...")

Moo

Some children are fascinated by dinosaurs... some by mythical creatures, like unicorns or mermaids... Others daydream of racing across the plains on horseback.  Little Jimmy's daydreams were populated by herds of cattle.

Bold Statement

"Well, say what you will about her sense of style, you've got to hand it to her:  she's not afraid to make a bold fashion statement."

Break-Up Blues

At least she still had darling Fifi... and she was casually conscious that she looked especially ravishing in her tweedy cardigan.  Eat your heart out, Bill!

Extravagance

Ah, yes...

Nothing says "extravagance" like granny squares.

Making Do

Due to a severe, worldwide shortage of fishnet hosiery, Natalia was forced to make do with the small amount of precious fishnet she had been able to procure. 

...Oh, and she also wore a very skimpy (crocheted?) top. 

Doily Muumuu

Yes, there are times when a loose-fitting gown is ideal (mostly when you're lounging around the house on a lazy day-- or sick day), but does anyone really need to crochet one? 

Imagine how much work must've gone into this thing!  You could be well on your way to completing an heirloom-quality crochet bedspread or tablecloth in a similar amount of time! 

A Day on the Water

I believe these are meant to be swimwear. 

Is it just me, or does the bottom piece look like it would be very heavy and baggy when wet?  Seems like you might lose them int he water... and (apart from the immediate, embarrassing problem of having no bikini bottom for the rest of the day) that might not be such a bad thing.

Multipurposing

Fashion Tip of the Day:

Wear a folded lapghan over one shoulder and secured under your favorite metallic, gold-tone belt for a truly unique look!

Now, that's a fashion statement!

Chunky Mesh

Chunky mesh is still mesh-- and, as such, is Wrong.

Nuzzle

Arnold was sadly afflicted with the inability to look natural (and not vaguely awkward or creepy) in a photo.  

Crochet Puppet Pets

Crochet Puppet Pets?  Come on, moms and dads. You're not fooling anyone.  At least let the kids have a goldfish in a bowl.  

...Or, failing that, a crochet puppet pet without weird yellow things dangling from its nose. 

What in the...

What is this thing?

Is it some bizarre scarf-type thing, or is it attached to the sweater?  ...And either way, wow.

Reach for the Sky

"You're on the right track, darling, but try reaching just a little higher, okay?  Yes!  That's it!  Hold that position!"

Yee-Haw, Y'all

The image quality is a little lacking, but still... crocheted boots!

 Ok, confess:  How many of you are already planning out how to make yourself a pair of these?

Brains!

Alluring zombie bikini model:

 ...in a crocheted bikini.

Elementary!

Dapper young Sherlock Holmes looks dashing in his red sweater... and matching pants.

A Little Nutty

Ariadne's mummy (whom you may remember from this post) finished crocheting her little darling's outfit just in time for the Giant Acorn Festival.

...True, she'd had to bluff her way through much of the skirt (yarn loops are such faster work than actual stitches), but there were plenty of giant acorns-- and that was what really mattered.

Unconvincing

I like granny squares as much as the next person.  They're a fun, versatile way to use up yarn remnants-- and they have a definite vintage/retro appeal. 

However, I remain unconvinced that they're the best choice for a dress / skirt and wrap / whatever this thing is...

No matter how skillfully it's draped, it looks a little too much like you're wrapped up in an afghan.

The ONE-PIECE

...And I thought crocheted/knitted pants were bad! 

This is so very, very wrong. 

(Words fail me, when it comes to one-pieces.)

In a Mood

I love it when there's text in a layout to tell me how I'm supposed to feel about what I'm seeing... or in this case, how the model feels:

This is interesting, because I wear a lot of stripes, but I never realized (until now) that wearing stripes means I'm in a sporty mood.  (And heaven knows you can't tell from looking at me that I'm such an extremely sporty-mooded person.)

This is better than a mood ring! 
So, tell me, guru-- how do I feel when I'm wearing paisley?

"A New Wrinkle"

I think this type of thing is the reason so many people are convinced that crochet is most decidedly not for garments:

...And what exactly makes this "a vest for all seasons"? 

...Please, someone reassure me that this doesn't mean the vest is supposed to worn alone (i.e. sans turtleneck) in the summertime...

...Please?

Bathing Beauty

Here's one for those of you dreaming of warmer days-- a swimsuit photo!

In its favor, it seems to actually cover up the parts that swimsuits are designed to cover. 

On the other side of the coin... it has "jewels" incorporated into the fabric... and there are pointless dangly bits hanging from the top.  (Seriously, what are those things?)

Artsy-Fartsy

Artistic or just plain odd? 

(I've made up my mind, but of course I wouldn't want to influence your opinion.)

Shudder

This is obviously meant to be art. . .

. . . but it still gives me the heebie-jeebies.

"D" is for Duh

Regarding the little duck-themed bib, I'd be afraid that might not be up to the task, unless you have a very tidy baby.  Or as Roy Scheider might say, "You're going to need a bigger bib."

I See London, I See France...

To be filed under "But WHY?":

Since she doesn't seem to be wearing anything under them, I can only conclude that these are themselves her underwear... but why would anyone want crocheted underwear?

Bewildered

This poor girl looks bewildered by the ugliness of the crochet dress she models. 
I must concur; it looks like a beginner's effort. 

Tinkerbell

Whoa!
That's some sparkly, furry novelty yarn!

What do you suppose she keeps in that bag (which seems to be just a pouch with a heavy chain knotted around the top)?  My bet's on pixie dust. 

Air-Conditioned Top

And now--  an afghan-towel-wrap-shirt-thing:

With fringe.  And a decorative flower. 

Everyone Has One

Yes, I know (most) kids love animals, so it's only natural that children's clothing is so often decorated with animal motifs...

But I must confess that I'm less familiar with a childhood interest in animal rears. 
Even if they are knitted and braided and wearing adorable bows.