Friday, July 2, 2010

How Do You Like Your Eggs?

Aunt Lydia's Design Studio, your source for. . . creepy owl wall hangings. . .?

Can you imagine that terrifying thing hanging on your wall?  Even worse, you get the feeling that it may be intended for a child's room.  Though I suppose a yarny demonic owl might have its practical uses. . .

"Now, tell Mommy the truth, Betsy.  Did you take a cookie even though I told you to wait until after supper?  --And remember,  Mr. Owl is watching-- always watching.  There's nothing he hates more than dishonest children.  If you lie, he might come to life and peck your eyes out."

. . . Then there's the Humpty Dumpty Rug.  As if the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme itself isn't horrifying enough. . .  ("Daddy, you mean they couldn't never put 'Umpty back together again?  Not never?"  "That's right, sonny.  Old Humpty's dead, just like you and everyone you've ever known will be, someday.") . . . Yes, as if that wasn't bad enough, they had to go and put a constant reminder of it in the kiddies' room! 

The Humpty rug is such a clever idea that you can find a variety of interpretations, such as this one, the Evil, Pig-Nosed Humpty:

Why is he a flesh colored circle instead of a white oval?  (Everyone knows Humpty's a egg, right?)  Why are there pompoms on his feet?  And why is he so very, very angry?

You can tell by the creepy smirk that he's busily dreaming up all sorts of wicked schemes. 

He's so awful to look at, yet that pathetic pink poodle can't tear its eyes away.   (Probably a wise move, Poodle.  I wouldn't turn my back on that one, if I were you.)

Aesthetics aside, those stuffed arms and legs seem designed for tripping up hapless visitors.  Just the sort of thing you want to leave lying around on the floor!

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