Make His Day.

I advise you not to mock the "veggie-saurus" on his sweater. 
(Poor anger management skills.  Plus he's fairly ruthless with that croquet mallet.)

(Snake) Charming

I know that in some cultures the snake is revered, but I just can't get over my Western urge to shudder at this sweater...  Really?  Of all the possible ways to decorate a sweater, this is what the designer settled on?

Fugly

Sometimes something's just plain fugly, and there's not much more to be said about it.

Finishing Touch

While the puffy, fuzzy sleeves (and shoulder pads) might have been enough to set this sweater apart, the hat seals the deal.  Tulle netting and a ponytail emerging from the top of a pink cylinder?  SOLD!

Dramatic Statements, Day Three

You can't fail to see the high drama brought out in our first (top) model by that stunning yellow sweater!  This time, the designer has upped the ante by adding beads to the fringe.  (Such spunk!)  Wear this with a pair of black gloves (the better to accentuate your dramatic hand posing), and people will be staring from two football fields away. 

For a more understated but still eye-riveting effect, try our second sweater of the day.  An attention-getter when layered over a simple black top, just imagine the effect when you do away with the first layer!  (Comes with matching rope-fringe hair ornament.)

Dramatic Statements, Day Two

First, we have a reworking of the ropey fringe, this time in combination with triangles and kite-shaped appliques of futuristic, metallic fabric.  You can tell from the young model's pose alone that she knows she's making a dramatic statement.

Then we have a charming mother-and-daughter team of dramatic sweaters.  They share similar dynamic designs of circular appliques and dots, but the mother's sweater also sports shoulder pads of a thickness and heft that the daughter does not yet have the years or aplomb to carry off with success.  Don't worry, dear.  Your time will come!

Dramatic Statements, Day One

Ladies, please direct your attention to the sweater on the left.  It's a violet vision of springtime with a liberal scattering of yellow and green bows-- like so many delicate butterflies-- and just a hint of lattice-like strips of mesh for superior ventilation. 

For the more daring woman, we proudly present the article on the right.  Colorful ropes of fringe form a bold diagonal across the body of the sweater, with a gathering of matching pompoms roosting on the left shoulder.  Pair it with black leggings and leather gloves and you will surely command every eye in the room. 

But How Else Could They Tell?

"Chad, I'm not trying to discount what you say about gaydar.  I'm just saying there may be some other... contributing factors to why you've been getting so many interested glances today."

*CRAZY*

Hey, don't blame me!  It says so right there in the lower lefthand corner:

...But yeah, now that they point it out, it does look kinda crazy... Mesh with diagonal stripes of fuzzy novelty yarn... and that hat!

Pooch Week: From Nose to Tail

Lest you think knitted pants are only for (ill-advised) humans... 

Pooch Week: Scraptastic

#1:   The use of fun fur-type yarn on a dog that already has fur never fails to intrigue. 

#2:  This dog's full-body sweater seems to have been made of whatever scraps were lying around.  On the one hand, I applaud this frugality.  (Let no yarn go to waste!)  On the other hand, doesn't man's best friend deserve better? 

#3:  What is that green, feathery-looking thing on top of the dog's head? 

#4:  Bravo for accepting (and meeting) the challenge to make the Dachshund (a breed of dog that looks a little silly under the best of circumstances) even more amusing to look at.  

Pooch Week: Vicarious

As Maryann tested the fit of the elaborate sweater-dress she'd just knitted for her beloved Muffin, the thought popped into her mind that perhaps Steve hadn't been completely wrong...  Was she living vicariously through her furry friend?  It was true that Muffin's engagement calendar was more full than her own...

Moo

Some children are fascinated by dinosaurs... some by mythical creatures, like unicorns or mermaids... Others daydream of racing across the plains on horseback.  Little Jimmy's daydreams were populated by herds of cattle.

Bold Statement

"Well, say what you will about her sense of style, you've got to hand it to her:  she's not afraid to make a bold fashion statement."

Resentment

Who can blame her, though?  Look!  They put her sweater on backwards!

Hallelujah!

Good grief, Antoine!  I mean, sure, the sweater's nice, but must you always take things too far??

(Well, what else did I expect?  You can tell at a glance that he's the ultimate Mr. Positive.)

I Can't Go On...

Dude, it's not that bad.  I mean, yeah, you are wearing a sweater draped over your shoulders while you're already wearing a sweater... but I promise, things will get better.  You just gotta hang in there... like that sweater hanging out on your already be-sweatered shoulders... Um, sorry.

You Poor, Deer Girl!

Celeste had been so excited when she found the pattern for those charming deer-head motifs.  (Deer were such important symbols in so many mythologies!)  Everyone else just wondered why she was wearing a sweater decorated with stylized deer skulls.

Poor thing; she never could understand why everyone assumed she was an avid huntress.

Sporty

This is just what my husband needs, the next time he goes pheasant shooting:

Classic Fanboy

Alfred tried his best to wait until January 27th-- a.k.a. Mozart's birthday, ZOMG!!!-- to unveil his awesome new sweater, but his willpower gave out sometime in mid-December...